Proverb - speak the truth

If we avoid speaking the truth in love . . . and with wisdom, we are saying the Gospel is not big enough for that situation.

Speaking the truth in frustration

Sometimes we speak the truth out of frustration, instead of speaking the truth in love. Love will speak the truth. Love will rebuke. But it will speak a truth that is in itself relational, because truth is found in a person - Jesus. We are ambassadors proclaiming the beauty and awe of the Word. And calling people from foolish deeds of death to an overwhelming beautiful Kingdom and to a Gospel that will set them free.

the call to messiness

The Christian life is not a call to earthly palaces or grandeur, it is the call to follow Jesus. This often means getting in the "trough" (muck) and "passion" (suffering) of peoples lives. This is the grandeur of the Heavenly Kingdom, it has the power to reach even the worst of places.

The cost of loving others

When Christ said that there is not greater love than one who lays down his life for another and commanded us to love as He has loved us. He meant it. Loving others will cost us our life. We must lay it down to love.

responding to a man's pursuit

This can be applied to men as well (and this is a general principle. I know each case can be different. And this is meant to only be a quick thought, not a full treatise about it.):

Often it is said that men should take the initiative to pursue women more. I think that this can often be true. I think one of the reasons that men don’t, however, is because of how women respond when they are not interested in being pursued. If he was her friend, she often pushes him away, and he loses her as a friend. Women, I know not every man has honor. But when a man of honor pursues you, and you say no, trust his integrity. Trust his strength (or at least God’s strength) to be able to continue to honor you as a friend. Just because a man pursues you, that is not a reason to push him away as a friend. When you treat a man this way you are telling him he is not strong. I know for me it makes me feel like I have failed, even if I have done things with integrity, because I have lost her trust in me, as a man. It may not be the end of the world, and even though my faith is not in how she responds, it still hurts. And on top of this, it is a loss of a dear friendship. Women if you want men to pursue you, then treat them like men when they do.

Beauty

Many years ago I watched this movie and one of the scenes stuck with me. The man had drawn a portrait of the woman he loved. When he drew the portrait, he didn’t hide who she was. The portrait was an accurate drawing of what she looked like faults and all. He showed it to her and explained that he knew her, he could see her faults, he didn’t have some fairy tale vision of who she was, but he loved her for who she was and that love was real. This is more than a fairy tale love. Its deeper and more real. And yes, I do want to love my wife this way, Lord willing, but, honestly, I do not know if God will give me a wife, but I do know that I can give this love to others. And I want them to know that Love.

loving others

A close married friend of mine was talking with me, today. And he said that when you get married you marry for "better or for worse" and sometimes that "worse" is you hurting because you know that you are not the man you want to be for your wife. You don't always know how to be there for her or give her what she needs. And you want so much more for her. But you don't back away. And you are not to be afraid of being her husband. You continue to be her husband and to walk with the Lord in loving her. You are her husband for "better or for worse", even when that "worse" is you.

This convicted me because I don't always feel adequate to be there for others and I always want to give so much more than I seem able to. I don't need to hide because I feel inadequate or because I hurt so much because I do not know how to be there. Sometimes you have to realize, regardless of you adequacy, it does not stop you from being a friend. And sometimes that is all you know how to be "for better or for worse".